Scars are the trophies you get for forgiving.

Dear 25 year old Nathan,

Regarding your daugther: Teach her to laugh at herself.

Think of the most difficult people in your life. Notice how they can’t laugh at themselves?

They are all easily offended.

They almost cherish being offended.

That escalatated fast.

This is a very lonely way to live your life; since it scares people away.

This is a very unhappy way to live your life; what could be a primary source of mirth is off limits when you can’t laugh at yourself.

How did they get there?


Unforgiveness settles in and creates a certain kind of person. It isn’t just about victim and aggressor. It eventually poisons everything. Unforgiveness ensures wounds never scar. I say scar because forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting, but it does mean healing. Scars are the trophies you get for forgiving.

Open wounds seriously compromise quality of life. To say the least, you can’t laugh at yourself if you are bleeding to death.

So teach her to forgive.

Which means doing it yourself.

You are currently pretty easily offended (no offense). It’s rooted in unforgiveness. And you know who. The good news is you will forgive. And now, most of the time, you don’t take yourself too seriously.

It’s so good you sorted this out.

If you didn’t , you’d be missing out on one of the most enjoyable things in your relationship with Acacia right now. She loves “giving her old dad the business”. But about 80% of the stuff she will tease you about is stuff you’d get huffy and defensive about if someone teased you about it now.

That’s just one of the unexpected rewards you’ll find on the other side of forgiveness.

So forgive young man, as the Lord forgives you.

She’ll watch you and figure it out.





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